The Courage to Be Myself
Would you like an extra dose of courage today? The courage to be yourself?
Well, I've got one for you, courtesy of my dear friend and mentor, Sue Patton Thoele. We've set the date for Sue's visit to this blog —Monday March 30—so mark your calendar! I can hardly wait for you to meet her.
In the meantime, take a few minutes to read through this insightful poem, penned by Sue herself, and let it work its magic upon you. I guarantee it will embolden you, give you courage in unforseen ways ...
"The Courage to Be Myself"
I have the courage to . . .
Embrace my strengths—
Get excited about life—Enjoy giving
and receiving love —Face and transform
my fears— Ask for help and support
when I need it—
Spring free of the Superwoman Trap—
Trust myself— Make my own decisions
and choices— Befriend myself—Complete
unfinished business—Realize that I have
emotional and practical rights—
Talk as nicely to myself
as I do to my plants— Communicate
lovingly with understanding as my goal—
Honor my own needs—
Give myself credit for my accomplishments—
Love the little girl within me—
Overcome my addiction to approval—
Grand myself permission to play—
Quit being a Responsibility Sponge—
Feel all of my feelings and act on them
appropriately—Nurture others because
I want to, not because I have to—
Choose what is right for me—Insist on being
paid fairly for what I do—
Set limits and boundaries and stick by them—
Say "yes" only when I really mean it—
Have realistic expectations—Take risks and
accept change—Grow through challenges—
Be totally honest with myself—
Correct erroneous beliefs and assumptions—
Respect my vulnerabilities—
Heal old and current wounds—
Favor the mystery of Spirit—
Wave goodbye to guilt—plant "flower"
not "weed" thoughts in my mind—
Treat myself with respect and teach others
to do the same—
Fill my own cup first, then nourish
others from the overflow—
Own my own excellence— Plan for the future
but live in the present— Value my
intuition and wisdom— Know that I am
lovable—Celebrate the differences between
men and women— Develop healthy, supportive
relationships— Make forgiveness a priority—
Accept myself as I am now--
This poem was originally published as a poster. Sue told me that it had its own brief claim to fame when Daphne, a main character on the television sitcom Frasier, had it hanging in her bedroom. I loved it the moment I read it and purchased one for myself. For the first time in my life, I felt as if I had encountered a woman who knew what it was like to struggle with living boldly, confidently, as your truest self. I saw myself in her words. How about you?
What line(s) from the poem touch your heart most deeply?
I'm eager to hear ...
~~~~~
Image courtesy of http://www.tendreams.org/boulet.htm. The title is "Hera," by artist Susan Seddon Boulet.
Don't forget to enter the March Book Giveaway by leaving a comment on this blog in March. I'm gifting a copy of The Woman's Book of Soul by Sue Patton Thoele. The winner will be drawn April 1st.
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19 comments:
This truly spoke to me: "Value my
intuition and wisdom— Know that I am
lovable—Celebrate the differences between
men and women— Develop healthy, supportive
relationships— Make forgiveness a priority—
Accept myself as I am now"
Choose what is right for me—
Have realistic expectations—Take risks and accept change—Grow through challenges—Be totally honest with myself.
Value my intuition and wisdom
Thank you for sharing this wonderful poem with us today! Truly inspirational!
i think when you have put enough years into this thing we call living a life, at one time or another through the journey all of these can ring some chimes... some of them we move through and on from; others we get a bit stuck in...
i'm really liking "be totally honest with myself" ... for me, it has always been enormously easy to be totally honest about all the ways i am flawed (to the point of exaggeration)... it has been a struggle to be totally honest about the good that is also inside of me...
i think this one sticks out for me right now because it is cross related to many of the others in this very insightful poem...
thank you for sharing...i look forward to Sue's visit too!!!
This is an all inclusive poem, Jan. So many of the lines are true to my heart. A few I am working on:
"overcome my addiction to approval"
"quit being a responsibility sponge"
"take risks and accept change"
and the most difficult one of all:
"face and transform my fears"
These are very gradual life-changing ideas, they will take time but I value the positive change it is making in my life more than the fear that holds me back.
Thank you for the inspiration.
Looking for to Sue's visit too!
JG
Tabitha,
Lovely choices. What I notice here is your choice of "valuing my intuition and wisdom," that paves the way for the rest of them to fall into place. If we all trusted our inner knowing more, we'd have a built-in radar system to better navigate our relationships and life in general. May courage be yours!
Caroline,
Your choices seem very focused in growth—and big growth—through being honest and taking risks. Wonderful. I am sending you lightening bolts of courage today!
Joanne,
I agree. All of these seem to ring true the longer we live. I noticed that when I first read the poem. Hey, soul sis, I thought of the honesty one too, for where I am right now. We will walk this journey together. Let's go to the beach...
Julie G,
You have selected very powerful self-blessings! LIke you, one of my earliest choices (12 years ago) was to stop taking responsibility for everyone and everything. That is a biggie. Also overcoming addiction to approval. (I still struggle with that one sometimes; many of us do. Oh, do we want to be liked.) I am sending you whooshes of courage today so that you can move toward facing and overcoming your fears. The path of the "spiritual warrior."
Bold and courageous self-love to you all!
One that struck me was to talk as nicely to myself as I do to my plants. Okay, just imagining doing that is soothing in itself! Because just think of what we encourage our plants as we nurture with our voices ... to grow, to reach toward the sun and unfold, to blossom.
Looking forward to Sue's visit as well.
This was exactly what I needed today! (How do you always know?) The entire poem spoke to me, since I am in the midst of a huge and important change of direction in my life right now.
The "courage to be myself" is exactly what I must embrace from now on. I've worked to instill this strength in my daughter since she was very young, so she doesn't have to struggle to find her true self at mid-life.
That's great! I like it all. How exciting to have her words hanging on Daphne's wall. :o))
I posted something similar a while back:
http://aglowingember.blogspot.com/2008/11/note-to-self.html
Joanne,
That phrase struck me too. I recall I laughed right out loud the first time I read it. Yes, considering talking to ourselves/treating ourselves that tenderly (as we would our plants) does have a soothing effect. I also love the notion of "unfolding"--love that word. :-)
Angela,
I am glad to hear that the poem came at the right time. Since you are in the midst of change there certainly is much to ponder here. May this time of transition be fruitful for you. May you have courage throughout! And so glad to hear that you are instilling the same in your daughter. Yes!
Carolynn,
Glad you liked it. I visited your site and, yes, what a perfect match your poem is to Sue's. Kindred spirits you are. I like your poem very much. I can feel self-acceptance throughout...
Jan, I am truly grateful for your presence in my life, AND the inspiring sisterhood of sacred feminine spirits you keep introducing us to!
Here's my favorite line:
"Fill my own cup first, then nourish others from the overflow"
I am doing a lot of work with guilt, especially in the cultural climate I was raised in, and still feel the weight of now.
Where do I get a copy of that poster??? I would like to put up one at home and at work!!!
PS. I will shortly be ordering a Sylvia Boorstein book:) Thank you, sister spirit.
Wow, there are so many things that resonate in this poem ... giving up the need for approval tops my list, followed by honoring the (wounded) little girl within. But truly, this entire poem had layers of meaning for me, and I thank you for sharing it. You are connecting so many souls through your work here, Jan!
Hi Jan, as others have said, thank you for a lovely poem. It's always centering to come and spend a couple of minutes on your site - it's really about the energy as much as the words. Anyway, the two I liked best are 'Ask for help and support when I need it' and 'Favor the mystery of spirit'.
Also, was just reading about the Tibetan Nuns Project, which I think you mentioned being involved with...was learning about the Tibetan Women's Association, as they honor the Tibetan women who participated in the uprising 50 years ago this Thursday....
Wonderful poem. Here are a few key lines for me:
Overcome my addiction to approval
Grant myself permission to play
Grow through challenges
Own my own excellence
I spose these are mainly related to the challenegs of a new job and fundraising, and just learning more about myself as I overcome obstacles. The play one definately speaks about what I've been trying to do with my art right now. The seek approval and own my own excellence ones go hand in hand for me, due to me wanting to be the best I can at work etc but also realising my own motivations for it.
Anyways, looking forward to the 30th, and thanks for the great post yet again!
Mermaid,
Thank you for your kind comments. :-) It's a pleasure. I love the line you noted about filling our own cup first. So very important, especially for those of us who are mothers. Then we can give from the overflow, instead of from resentment or out of guilt. I believe the poster is out of print, but I will ask Sue. I will get back with you! (You will love Sylvia's books!)
Cindy,
Yes, the need for approval is a big one for many of us. Me too. And a life-long one to overcome. In mid-life, though, this one does seem to get a bit easier. :-) Perhaps it's just less estrogen and more testosterone, but we do seem to get more "self-contained" and bold.
Lisa,
Asking for support and help is an important one, as you say. Those of us who are so very capable have a tendency to go solo and struggle through. Especially moms, right? And I can see how the "mystery" one would appeal to you too. Thanks for the heads up on the Tibetan Women's Association. I will check it out. :-) I still need to buy my Nuns calendar for the year. On the other hand, I am hoping to come into a windfall so I can "adopt" a nun for a year. It sounds like a wonderful program.
Haley,
You've selected a number of these that sound very powerful for where you are in your journey right now. The challenge seems to be honoring all aspects of ourselves, esp. with new job demands. I love the one about owning your own excellence. Delightful!
Blessings all around, y'all!
This line in particular - "Fill my own cup first, then nourish
others from the overflow," struck me. Having flown recently, I was reminded of the flight attendant's instruction in the event of loss of cabin pressure to secure one's own oxygen mask before assisting others.
Hi Linda,
Thank you for stopping by. The line you selected is so key to being all that we can be--to and for ourselves. Not always easy, but essential!
so happy I found your blog...I found this poem when I returned to was in college several years ago...had it framed and years later it is still hanging in my office where I am attemtpting to become a published writer....it has brought me through so many hard times, spouse abuse, death, disappointments of every sort...but still it hangs on the wall to remind me to accept myself...and press on....
This was so beautiful. Like a prayer between you and God, for yourself. God is forgiving,so shall I be.I see alot in this as have so many of my friends with the line thats says " the (wounded) little girl within".So strong and empowering. Forgiving and healing. thank you.
I have had this poster for approx. 30 years and it still hangs on my wall in the living room. I love it and what it says but most of all I love it because of the way it makes me FEEL.
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