Do You Have the Wisdom to Know the Difference? A Luminous Guest and Giveaway!

Please welcome another spiritual luminary to our fold, dear friends—Eileen Flanagan—the author of a an enlightening new book, The Wisdom to Know the Difference: When to Make a Change and When to Let Go. 

Eileen is a practicing Quaker, spirituality writer (she blogs for the Huffington Post) and teacher. With a clear, open mind and a wise, warm heart she has created a truly interspiritual book based on the Serenity Prayer—and how to apply it in everyday life.

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can change, 

and wisdom to know the difference."

I am a huge fan of the Serenity Prayer, having been taught it by my Methodist grandmother who believed that this very simple prayer could provide guidance on just about everything.

Eileen agrees, and demonstrates how by interviewing dozens of people from all spiritual persuasions who share intimate stories of how discernment—with serenity, courage, and wisdom—have helped them deal with whatever life had to offer. She also reveals much about her own life journey with the Serenity Prayer as a guide.

I am thoroughly enjoying this book and highly recommend it. Chapters on "The Courage to Question," "Knowing Yourself," "Practicing Loving Acceptance," and "Letting Go of Outcomes" touched my heart. I had the opportunity to ask Eileen about my favorite chapter though, "Seeking Divine Wisdom" and what that really means. AND, how one accesses it ...

Her answers are here and Eileen is too, stopping by when she can to say hello. Her book tour is keeping her very busy, as this book just received the Silver 2010 Nautilus Award and been endorsed by His Holiness the Dalai Lama himself. Congratulations, Eileen and welcome to "Awake is Good"!

Friends, leave a comment for Eileen and you'll be entered into a Giveaway Drawing for her marvelous book. Enjoy!

1. What do you mean by "divine wisdom" or guidance?

I believe that we are connected to something greater than ourselves—whether you call it God, Spirit, the Divine, or any other name—and that sometimes when we’re paying attention to that connection, we feel called in a specific direction. For example, I feel I have a calling to be a writer and that God nudged me in that direction in little ways over time until it became clear to me that writing was what I was meant to do. Many spiritual traditions talk about this kind of process, which usually involves listening to our “inner voice,” that part of us deep down that knows the right direction. We often forget to pay attention to it because we’re so busy or our lives are so full of noise. We usually need to make time and space in order to listen for divine wisdom. Sometimes we are scared to stop and listen because we are afraid of change, but divine guidance usually brings us more peace when we follow it, rather than less. So, it was scary when I felt called to quit my job and write my first book, but ultimately it made me much happier.

2. How can we be sure that what we "hear" is divine guidance and not something else?

That’s very tricky because human beings are great at fooling themselves. Many spiritual traditions say that when you are truly guided by the Divine you will feel a sense of peace and clarity, even if the decision is difficult. Another test is to see if the feeling of peace lasts over time. The excitement of a whim won’t necessarily persist, but clarity will last when you are on the right course, even if there are ups and downs. Finally, sharing your process with people whose wisdom you respect can be really helpful. If you’re afraid to tell anyone else what you’ve heard, that may be a sign that there’s something not quite right about it. If what you “hear” will be harmful to other people (not just surprising or inconvenient, but actually harmful) that’s another warning sign.

3. What about looking for "signs"? This is something we often hear bandied about as "New Age" jargon...

This is also tricky. Quakers say that sometimes “way opens,” which means that you feel like the universe is helping you; things fall into place in amazing ways, which you couldn’t have figured yourself out if you tried. I’ve had this experience, and it can be a wonderful confirmation that you’re on the right course. On the other hand, you can twist anything to be a sign, if you try hard enough. Or sometimes you will face obstacles, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you should give up. I think paying attention to outward signs always has to be combined with paying attention to inward signs, what’s happening inside you. Then you see if they match up. For example, I was recently encouraged to apply for a job, which in some ways really fit me. I could have seen it as a sign that this job came out of the blue. On the other hand, it would have meant some changes in my family life that did not feel right to me, and it would have meant a lot less time to write. Even though the outward signs were encouraging, I didn’t have peace and clarity about it, so I decided not to pursue it. Again, having a trusted confidant can help to keep these things in perspective.

4. How can we overcome fear or hesitation about following divine guidance?

First, you have to acknowledge the fear. If you pretend that fear isn’t there, it will just go underground and you may find yourself procrastinating or sabotaging yourself unconsciously. I find journaling can help me to both acknowledge and work through my fears. Another strategy is to start by taking a tiny step every day, instead of focusing on the big thing you want to do. The big thing probably feels a whole lot more scary than a baby step. You’ll make a lot of progress toward the big goal if you keep taking little steps, and you’ll probably develop some courage along the way, so you’re ready when you do need to take a leap. Another thing is to line up support. I just can’t say enough about having wise, supportive people in your corner, helping you when you need it. It’s a real key that many spiritual traditions acknowledge.


Bio:  
Eileen Flanagan speaks about spirituality on television and radio, at national conferences, and on college campuses. A leader in her Quaker community, her award-winning writing addresses people of all backgrounds, helping them to live with greater serenity and courage. Although she holds a BA from Duke and an MA from Yale, her greatest life lessons have come from caring for her two children and her dying mother, experiences that are woven throughout her writing. She teaches at University of the Arts in Philadelphia, where she lives with her husband and two children. 

Visit her website: www.eileenflanagan.com 
and her blog, "Imperfect Serenity": http://www.eileenflanagan.com/blog